Tuesday, May 18, 2010

2 weeks notice.

So today at work, I handed in my 2 weeks notice. It's a job I have had for the past 8 years (6 with the company). While it hasn't been great, it has kept the bills paid, food in the belly and alot of entertainment.

The funny thing is, while most people are doing everything to keep their job, I just wanted out of mine. I haven't actually been enjoying my job for the past 3 years. But, I was content to stay, since I had bills to pay.

I still have bills to pay, but, I need to finally kick the lazy me in the ass and get back to what I know. The road.

It won't be easy. Hell it will be hard as shit. But in the end I feel it is the best choice for me and my family. While it will mean time away from them. It will give them strength, and i will get back a part of me that I left along time ago.

I learned at a wise company, along time ago, That if the "Magic" is gone. You leave. Since your only hurting yourself and everyone around you by staying. The "Magic" has been gone from this job for quite a while, this year I finally woke up and was willing to deal with it.

In the end, we all have to follow the path that brings us back to ourselves.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

What a differance a day makes.

So, I have been pondering my life's goals. Come to find out I never had any. Just live life as it comes too me, and never look back. No regrets.

Well that didn't work so well.

A wise man once said "Some people play the cards they are dealt, some people deal the cards". At times we are both things. Im my life I have re-dealt the cards 2 times so far.

Once, when I went on the road and then when I finally left the road. I'm now planning on dealing the cards again for the 3rd time. Do I have regrets for my past? yes. I regret some of the things I did, the people I hurt, the choices I had to make.

But, when I look at the good memories I have of those times the adventures i got to go on. I wonder why I have the regret. Why should I feel bad about something that Gave me so much fun, and pleasure.

many movies have brought up the idea of, if you could do it all again.. would you make the same choices?

Through all the hurt, all the pain. All the questions...

This month has been a lot about soul searching for me. Wondering what would have happened. But through it all, I would have to say yes. YES! I would make all the same decisions again. At the time they were the right one's because it led me on the path to where I am. I get to indulge my creativity in directing Seminar, and I get to indulge my passionate side in pushing audio drama with Audio Drama talk. and I get to indulge myself in crashespad... the dork side of me gets shown right here. Plus I have a loving wife who has been though.. well hell with me. Through my cancer surgery, and my many mental breaks. I have a son that is too smart for his own good, yet loves me unconditionally.

yes, I'm not rich. I'm not famous. But I have a life I can be proud of. I'm ready to deal the cards again. But, in the game of life. So far. I'm at least breaking even.